Tolerating ambiguity for alternative awareness: MFA Thesis - Painting & Drawing

Abstract

In this heuristic investigation of a phenomenological study of Moustakas’s (1990) Creative Synthesis. the research question was, “What is my experience of painting?” Maintaining a steady practice in my art studio for two years as an MFA student, I kept observation notes on my process. Journals were coded for themes, and I summarized findings. Themes included sustained engagement for the expansion of awareness beyond thresholds of familiar experiencing, increased ability to dwell in disequilibrium and resist premature closure, and the experience of a shift in awareness at which point an observing-self witnessed my actions as I painted. My painting process was found to be a practice of tolerating ambiguity for altered awareness to create paintings, not from a premediated concept, but from attunement to intuition.