Intraracial Women Friendships as a Strategy for Healing Black Women

Abstract

Sisterhood has been something that I’ve sought after in my life frequently. I have noticed that there is power in the connection amongst black women that offer spaces of safety and comfort. A sister-friend in my life has been defined as a friendship between black women. Having a sister-friend is important in the world as a black woman for many reasons. This essay will explore the connections between black women's friendships and healing within spaces created specifically for them. I will also explore strategies that will further provide spaces for healing black women. According to Civil Rights Leader Malcolm X, "The black woman is the most disrespected, unappreciated entity in America" and there is a history to prove it. Black women are the receivers of oppression in two different ways, sexism and racism. The othering of black women happens in tons of spaces, medical, domestic, judicial. Black women's bodies and minds are constantly degraded and policed worldwide and in their own community. There is a necessity to create homogenized safe spaces for black women because of the lack of protection within an integrated society. My experience as a black woman is similar to many other black women’s experiences. In quoting Dubois, I fell under the “Exceptional Negro” category, I was revered for being smart but I was still viewed and treated as a black child. That includes criminalization, quantification, and racist discrimination. My educational progress did not apply in many classrooms if that meant me talking about the oppression of African American people. In those instances, my intelligence was milled down to anger and complaints instead of me presenting historical facts that provide the framework for how black students operate in America. Even in my home, I had to be extremely responsible as a child, I was aggressively policed and groomed to be constantly aware of how and my body was a weapon against myself. From the ages of five, I remember feeling responsible to not only protect it from racial discrimination but from the gaze of men. Zora Neale Hurston once said, “I feel the blackest when thrown up against a sharp white background”, but that is not just the case for black women. We feel that way in our communities as well as in our families. The most rewarding experience of being a black woman is friendship amongst other black women. We create the stronghold of our communities but we also hold each other up. We have the proper tools to take care of each other, to undo what patriarchal standards have submitted us too, and to heal the generational wounds we have endured. There are already cultural practices we involve ourselves with in an effort to preserve ourselves such as hair care. Most black women's friendships foster proper healing practices for black women because they are devoid of pity and are action-based. Traditional Western therapy while necessary for some, can most times be culturally deaf and westernized. For black women to feel comfortable to unload the generational trauma and everyday trauma that they are affected with, there must be a culturally inclusive and culturally competent space that allows them to express themselves free of guilt.