I Can No Longer Wait Patiently For the End: Trauma, agency, and healing through dance

Abstract

Conceived in response to trauma, the following is a collage of quotes, analysis, imagery, and poetry that have been collected, gleaned, and arranged. Throughout this work I present three miniature case studies of trauma that highlight the precarious nature of dance pedagogy. In tandem with this collage, I share my own choreographic process. Over the course of five months I worked with ten people to create a dance piece that was performed in mid April of 2022. The work entitled "I can no longer wait patiently for the end" is a means to physicalize and put into practice the research I am sharing with you here. The main question I am deliberating in this body of work is how do I create and sustain an ethical dance practice? In addition, how do I work to dismantle the inherent trauma of dance pedagogy? How do I do so while healing from my own trauma? Or in other words, how do I avoid acting in the abusive ways that are familiar to me. I not only share my own voice, but the voices of teachers, mentors, friends, and colleagues. All people who have extensive experience within dance pedagogy and the field of dance.